Friday, October 18, 2013

Moving? Splendid!

LP Stacey and I are in the process of moving from our very cramped little house to a far more spacious condo.  We have two weeks of overlap between getting the keys to the new place and needing to be out of the old place, so we're trying to make at least one trip a night to make Big Moving Day go a little more smoothly.

Every single time I move (and I moved a lot during college), I think about the Disney movie The Sword in the Stone, and how Merlin was able to pack everything he owned into a small bag with nothing but a wave of his wand and a musical spell.  Oh, how I wish this was possible in real life...

Every time I prepare to move, I tell myself that it's going to be better than the last time.  I'm going to be more organized.  I'm going to pack earlier.  I'm going to go through my closet before I start packing to sort things for donation.  I do think I've gotten slightly better at it over the years (though Scott would probably disagree), but I've come to realize that there are a few phases of moving that I will never get over.  

Phase 1: Optimism
"This is going to be great!"  I'm so excited to move into the new place!  It's going to be so cute!  I'm going to keep it so nice and clean!"

Phase 2: Denial
"We still have plenty of time to pack.  I know we're going to be out of town for three days in the middle of  the move, but that's fine.  Besides, I don't really have that much stuff."

Phase 3: Acceptance
"I should probably start packing.  The two week overlap is not really that much time.  New plan: pack at least one box per night till we get the keys.  Then move one truckload every night."

Phase 4: Purging
"When was the last time I used this?  Do I need it?  I don't think I need it.  Donation pile!"

Phase 5: Meltdown
"Mom? I don't think I can get this all done before we move.  Can you take the afternoon off of work tomorrow to come help me?  You can?  Great!  Wait, I can handle it.  Nevermind... Well maybe...  I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT, OKAY?!  I'M JUST SO TIRED OF MOVING!  I NEVER WANT TO MOVE AGAIN!  I'M GOING TO DIE IN THE NEW APARTMENT!"

Phase 6: Desperation/Panic
"I don't know what box I want that in!  Here, just throw it in this garbage bag.  No, I know it already has a shoe, a blanket, and a bunch of hangers in it.  That doesn't mean you can't put that can of beans in there too.  It will be fine.  Just put it in the bag!" Also, "We can clean the kitchen with bathroom cleaner, right?  Like use this bleach spray stuff inside the fridge, right?  Whatever, it will be clean, and that's all that matters."

Phase 7: Closure
"I am so glad to be out of this crappy house.  I won't miss the crooked floors, faulty appliances, or two front doors."

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